A thoughtful post

Read Genesis 1:25-31, better yet I'll post it right here for you:

" 25God made the beasts of the earth after their kind, and the cattle after their kind, and everything that creeps on the ground after its kind; and God saw that it was good.
26Then God said, "Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; and let them rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over the cattle and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth."
27God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.
28God blessed them; and God said to them, "Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it; and rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over every living thing that moves on the earth."
29Then God said, "Behold, I have given you every plant yielding seed that is on the surface of all the earth, and every tree which has fruit yielding seed; it shall be food for you;
30and to every beast of the earth and to every bird of the sky and to every thing that moves on the earth which has life, I have given every green plant for food"; and it was so.
31God saw all that He had made, and behold, it was very good. And there was evening and there was morning, the sixth day."

This is the creation story its pretty basic and straight forward but that doesn't mean its not thought provoking. Look at verse 31 notice it says it was very good. Adam and Eve had done nothing but they were acceptable because God said he was. So if God says we are 'very good' why do we struggle with this need for significance? Since the fall of man we have been isolated from our true form of significance and we have been trying to fill the void ever since.

We are trying to fill this void with everything but the one thing that can fill it. Its the whole 'God shaped hole' theory. I think a lot of people use this analogy wrong, this isn't the salvation message this is the how to live your life message.

If we could just focus on living for Christ instead of others we would all be a lot happier.

My contradicting opinions on self worth.

So yes I'm still going through the book "The Search for significance" slowly but surly. Anyway I'm now working my way through he work book part and one question asked me this:



"Is it difficult to view yourself in terms other than your performance or others opinions of you? If so why?"

I found my answer pretty interesting, if I do say so myself. It went something like this: At work I have no problem with my self-worth I know I'm a good interpreter and I do my job well. However at home or with friends and family my works are only 'good' if they approve.

Humm interesting, looking this over and thinking about it, it may have something to do with opinions none the less. At work I often hear good job, nice stats, its good to have you here. I know I'm appreciated. But outside of work we don't do that (not just my family and friends all people) we don't take the time to appreciate people for what they do and for the support they give us. I guess this is really two fold, what am I expecting from people and what am I giving people?

Here is the definition of self-worth from the book pg 163 " Self-worth, often called self-esteem or personal significance, is characterized by a quite sense of self-respect and a feeling of satisfaction with who we are. true self -worth, unlike pride, is not based on an evaluation of our performance."

I guess you could say one of my love languages was words of affirmation, but my self-worth should not depend on them.

I'm taking this as a challenge how can I encourage those around me?

The risk of self-worth.

I've finished the book, The Search for Significance, and now I'm going through the workbook section. Its been an interesting ride, I've learned a lot I just wish I could implement some of the strategies faster. Of course it takes a long time to overide 26 years of doing the opposite.

Anyway that is not my point, through this journey I've been doing a lot of observing of other people trying to figure out how they tick, and this morning as I was driving to work I had an interesting thought.

"If we focus to much on what we think of ourselves and not what others think, that we get stuck. We don't realize the parts of us that still need improvement or the parts of us that are still hurting." (I hope that makes sense this is hard to explain)

This is why its so vital to keep God in the mix as well as solid Christian friends. We need people around us to encourage us and point out things that we are doing wrong. I know the word conviction isn't a popular one but just think of where the world would be without Godly conviction let alone legal conviction....yikes.

I guess I was under the impression that if I could just stop living life for other peoples opinions I would be good. I never thought about that fact that since I'm an all or nothing type of girl this could fall drastically the other way. Instead of worrying about what others think there are some that don't care at all what others think, they are always right and are living for themselves. There needs to be a balance between depending on others opinions to make you happy and not caring at all.

Thoughts on Thursdays

Humm so I was reading my book again ("The Search for Significance" by Robert S. McGee) and once sentence really hit me not just for spiritual reasons but for relationship reasons. Here it is " Conviction deals with your behavior, not our status before God."( pg133 in the new version)

This is also, I believe, how we should view our marriages. We need to understand that when our spouse is correcting or asking us to change something it doesn't affect their love for us its simply a behavior that needs adjustment. I have a bad habit of forgetting where I placed my phone and it drives my husband nuts however I know that when he points it out to me he doesn't love me any less he just doesn't want to spend money on a new phone.

However I have a harder time accepting that reality when he is pointing out my tone or something like that. Then it is much harder to remember the 'love' part and go straight to feeling guilty. This changes how I think he views my 'status' when in fact it does not. He still loves me just the same but he is trying to improve our communication.



Guilt refers to our status and how we think others feel about us.

Conviction is without guilt it doesn't change our status there is just room for improvement.


Wow, that could change marriages right there. If we could train ourselves to view things this way....If we could simply remember throughout the corrections and annoyances that you still love each other and your are only trying to better the marriage not tear each other apart or blame them for everything. We also make sure we are approaching things this way, building the marriage not tearing it down.

Fear and Faith

So one of the major points of the book I'm reading is this, I do not need to fear making mistakes or being wrong, God already knows everything I've done and will do and he sent his Son to die for me. He still loves me I don't need to work for His approval and HIS approval is what matters.

Wow, it all makes sense its all stuff I've heard before but its never hit me like this I've never been receptive to this information before (thanks hubby for following your heart and God's prompting.) Here is a quote from the book that hit me today "Fear and faith can never be coequal. One will always dominate the other. The more you give yourself to fear the more difficult it is to experience faith in your life"

Here is a part of a song that reminds me of this:

Mac Powell - By His Wounds

He was pierced for our transgressions
And crushed for our sins
The punishment that brought us peace was upon Him
And by His wounds, by His wounds we are healed

We are healed by Your sacrifice
And the life that You gave
We are healed for You paid the price
By Your grace we are saved
We are saved

He was pierced for our transgressions
He was crushed for our sins
The punishment that brought us peace was upon Him
And by His wounds, by His wounds we are healed
And by His wounds, by His wounds

What can wash away my sin?
Nothing but the blood of Jesus

Learning some not so pretty things.

Sunday our sermon was on idols and how anything that distracts us from God can be an idol. Now obviously this can be taken to the extreme, not everything in your life is an idol. However I personally believe we all have a few. What are the things in out life that we count on to make us happy? For me its my relationships, when something goes wrong or I need a boost I call my husband, family or friend. My first instinct is not to call on God. I was reading in my "The Search for Significance book and something really jumped out at me:

"If we base our self-worth on the approval of others, then we are actually saying that our ability to please others is of greater values than Christ's payment. We are the sinners, the depraved, the wretched, and the helpless. He is the loving Father, the seeking, searching, patient Savior who has made atonement for the lost and has extended to us His grace and son ship. We add nothing to our salvation. It is God who seeks us out, convicts us of sin, and reveals Himself to us. It is God who gives us the very faith with which to accept Him. our faith is simply our response to what He has done for us.... His work through others is, in part, to serve as a channel by which we can better understand His divine love and acceptance of us. Sadly, we are all prone to miss His message and mistake His messenger(s) as the source of out fulfillment."

Ouch and at least for me so true, I can't wait to learn how to turn this back the right way. I've tried and failed so many times on my own.

Ouch- This is hard to hear.

1 Corinthians 3:1-4

1Brothers, I could not address you as spiritual but as worldly—mere infants in Christ. 2I gave you milk, not solid food, for you were not yet ready for it. Indeed, you are still not ready. 3You are still worldly. For since there is jealousy and quarreling among you, are you not worldly? Are you not acting like mere men? 4For when one says, "I follow Paul," and another, "I follow Apollos," are you not mere men?

Quote from The Search for Significance by Robert S. McGee

"Many of us are like the Christians at Corinth. We still try to obtain our significance the world's way, through success and approval. Often, we look only to other believers rather than to Christ Himself. we learn to use the right christian words, claim divine power and guidance, and organize programs, and yet so often, our spiritual facade lacks depth and substance. Our spiritual activities become human efforts lacking the real touch of the mater. In effect, we live a lie."

Ouch that is hard to hear, especially when it is true. How do I go about changing my focus from the praise of man (including myself) to the glory of God?

This was shown to me very clearly last night. I just found out that I didn't make it to the final round of interviews for a promotion I applied for. When I was thinking it over last night one of the many, many thoughts that went through my head is who was I doing this for? Who was I trying to impress? Don't get me wrong, that wasn't my only motivation and I will apply for this position again, but why is that even a part of my motive? My reason on this earth has nothing to do with impressing those around me it has everything to do with God.

Do Good

Wow read this and think for a min. Its a quote from my book "The Search for Significance." I'm only a few chapters in because I'm trying to really read and comprehend what I'm reading. Therefore I'm still in the ground laying chapters. This section is in chapter on "God's Answer: Justification" and is talking about sin and reasons not to sin #4 is "His commands for us are good."

"In today's society, we have lost the concept of doing somethign because it is the right thing to do. Instead, we do things in exchange for some reward or favor, or to avoid punisment. Wouldn't it be novel to do sometign simply because it is the rgiht thing to do?"

Wow, isn't that the truth.

I'm learning

You know its hard to be human, always feeling pressure to live up to every ones expectations.

However do the people around us really expect the things we think they do? Does my husband really expect the house to be spotless and for dinner to be perfectly timed to his arrival from work? NO, and he has told me as much, so why don't I believe him? Who is really putting the pressure on me....me?

Why? am I really that much of a people pleaser? I'm starting (as in just done with Chapter 1) the book "The Search for Significance" by Robert S. McGee. Since I'm just starting it I don't know if I will recommend it or not but I will keep you updated as I go through. Here is the quote from the book that honestly convinced me to read it

"But the man or woman who lives only for the love and attention of others is never satisfied-at least, not for long. Despite our efforts we will never find lasting, fulfilling peace if we must continually prove ourselves to others"

That sounds a awful lot like me....Hummm.